Thank you all so very much for your kind words.
Still feeling completely at a loss of what to do with myself, and find myself bursting into tears at very odd moments - especially if I catch myself out for not thinking of her. Bizarre... like if I don' think about her and how wonderful she was as a best friend, I'm going to forget her. Bit of beating up on myself too for not being able to make her better, which is not right, cancer is cancer, but still... I think a lot of you will know what I mean.