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Thread: Grief and Guilt...

  1. #11


    This is something I always go back to and re-read. This was sent to me when I lost 'pups' - so a pass forward is the go !

    Our inability to completely protect
    and keep from harm those we love
    is a painful but inherent part
    of the human condition.

    Let solace be taken, however,
    in knowing that we gave the best
    we had to our ‘little’ friends,
    and that they knew,
    without an inkling of doubt,
    that they were deeply loved,

    For beyond all else,
    that is the greatest gift we give to them,
    and in turn,
    the greatest gift they give to us.

    Remember them all for all the joy
    and love that they bought into our lives.
    They were all good mates.

    BY: Anon

    Just remember that you are talking to the converted here, and our thoughts are with you at this sad time.

    No regrets, but feel very proud of yourselves - because you were there for the pup when he needed you the most - and that is a very special gift you gave willingly.

  2. #12


    Hugs from me, too. We all, at some point, find we make a mistake, from often not knowing there was an answer we didn't know existed. It helps if you help to save someone elses loved dog, donate to a pensioners dogs operation, or to a Bali dog, in memory of your dog - or adopt again, if you feel you can. Spread the word about animal taxis and animal ambulances. It isn't a guilt you should carry on your own. Taxi drivers should have that info on them, if they won't help you. Your vet or vet nurse should have made sure you knew of these options, if they knew you had no transport. They should be aware of those services, professionally - and people like you,who are not aware of how things have changed over 20 years, should be asked if it's interest. I wish I could have helped, that SOMEONE you knew would have volunteered to help.... Big hugs again.

  3. #13
    Join Date
    Oct 2010
    Southern NSW


    I am so sorry for your loss of your beautiful Beau.....I know those guilt feeling all too well. And Hindsight is always perfect. But Beau had your love and that counts more then anything, it is the the most beautiful gift that you could possibly have given him....A loving home for all those years. I hope that your tears may one day change to smiles when you think of him. I have many dogs that I sadly lost. And I will always miss them. But now I can think of some of them with a smile and fond memories.

    Godspeed Beau, another sweet angel for Rainbow Bridge.

    Rainbow Bridge

    Just this side of Heaven is a place called Rainbow Bridge. When an animal dies that has been especially close to someone here, that pet goes to Rainbow Bridge. There are meadows and hills for all of our special friends so they can run and play together. There is plenty of food, water and sunshine and our friends are warm and comfortable. All the animals who had been ill and old are restored to health and vigor; those who were hurt or maimed are made whole and strong again, just as we remember them in our dreams of days and times gone by. The animals are happy and content, except for one small thing: they each miss someone very special, someone who was left behind. They all run and play together, but the day comes when one suddenly stops and looks into the distance. His bright eyes are intent; his eager body begins to quiver. Suddenly, he breaks from the group, flying over the green grass, faster and faster. You have been spotted, and when you and your special friend finally meet, you cling together in joyous reunion, never to be parted again. The happy kisses rain upon your face; your hands again caress the beloved head, and you look once more into those trusting eyes, so long gone from your life, but never absent from your heart. Then you cross the Rainbow Bridge together...
    Pets are forever

  4. #14
    Join Date
    Aug 2011
    Bundaberg QLD


    Beau was a great looking dog and i can understand the way you feel right now. I'm so sorry to hear of his passing.
    Your story sounds a bit like mine when i lost my last dog. I got his ahes back intending to spread them in his favourite places....but i cant bring myself to do it so nearly a year later i still have them........waiting for that day that it feels right. I'm not sure that day will ever come.

    It does get easier eventually. There where days that i didnt think of him and then when i remembered i felt guilty for forgetting him. It's a tuff path to travell and i wish you all the best with it. He had a fair innings and i'm sure he loved every minute of having such a caring and loving owner. RIP Beau.

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  5. #15
    Join Date
    Apr 2010


    Dreamsarefree, every single person here understands your grief as well as your guilt. No matter what steps we take, what path we walk, what forks in the road we choose, we always wonder "what if". You made the right decision based on your circumstances at that time. Maybe had the circumstances changed, you may have made a different decision... but you will never know, and please don't second guess yourself - because that's punishment, and you did the right thing. You listened to your Vet and took their advice. Don't let hindsight blind you to how much joy Beau gave you and your family, or how much love you gave him.

    {{{{{ Hugs }}}}} to you.

  6. #16
    Join Date
    Dec 2011
    Logan, Brisbane QLD


    My deepest sympathies for your loss. Your story together was so endearing and i found it hard to fight back the tears. I agree with everybody else, bathe in the happy memories and leave all the 'what if's'. He was very blessed to have such a loving owner.

  7. #17


    Thank you for all your kind words of understanding which has meant so much to me...I will try to focus on the great times we had with my big beautiful Beau.
    My boy is home with me now. His ashes and mementoes were delivered to me on Saturday, very sad but has also comforted me as this is where he belongs with those who loved him. Beau's vet sent me a lovely sympathy card and his vet at BVECCS have also taken on board my suggestion of making people aware of the pet transport available to them so someone else and their beloved pet don't have to go through the harrowing experience I did.
    I will also make a donation to the RSPCA in Beau's memory and hope it helps someone else when they are in need of help and compassion.
    Big hugs to you all and your special best friends, never take them for granted and give them all the love they give you every day unconditionally.

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