I have to have a vent...
My daughter - nearly 7 - goes to the local public school. And I have been getting increasingly angry over the way they handle things. It's just a whole lot of little things that add up and yesterday I was about to explode. I must add that my reaction is also made a lot worse because of the way they treated my neighbour who cares for her granddaughter who is hopelessly falling behind at that school and no one gives a stuff.
This week my girl's lunch order was stolen and she came home absolutely starving. Of course I confronted the teacher about this the next day and was told it would be dealt with. When I asked my daughter about it, she said the teacher had told her that the child who took her lunch "didn't know it wasn't hers". Of course I call BS on that. Lunch orders have the child's name written on them in big, fat letters. My girl told me the child was hiding her own sandwich behind her back when she took her food. So the kid got away with lying, my daughter has no confidence that this will not happen again and I was offered no follow up or compensation for the lunch order I paid for. Anywho, I calmed myself down and moved on.
Then my daughter tells me yesterday that she was sent to the deputy principal's office 3 times in a row because some girl told 3 different teachers that my girl had "kicked her in the private parts". Now I am not the kind of parent who thinks their child can't do anything wrong. But my girl would not use violence. Just doesn't have it in her. She actually has never deliberately hurt a child. Even though on occasions I have tried to convince her to stand up for herself by hitting or kicking back! I was very proud of her that she actually spoke up for herself and told the staff that she didn't do it. Only to get told that she must be lying... The girl who 'dobbed her in' had told my girl that she would do anything to prevent her from playing with this other child at lunch time. And it worked a treat. She spent her whole lunch hour in time out.
A similar thing happened once before in daycare and severely affected her then. And all last year in her first year at school, she was held hostage by these "friends" who constantly threatened to "tell on her" if she didn't do what they wanted her to. I worked so hard with her to teach her some assertiveness and to convince her to stand up for herself. And then this!
She is now more likely to give in to threats of being told on - when she has done nothing wrong - and will be more unlikely to ask staff for help.
Sorry about the rant. It is the last day of term here. But we are leaving on holiday today. So I just sent an email to the principal. Who no doubt will just shrug her shoulders, but I had to show my daughter that I at least will always stand up for her and believe her.