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Thread: How Do You Make Friends??

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Feb 2009
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    Default How Do You Make Friends??

    This isn't suppposed to be a 'poor me' thread. I was just thinking about things and thought I'd see what other people thought

    I was thinking I'd love to go have a coffee or something after work today since my OH wont be home till late but I've come to a realisation (sp?) that I dont have any friends.

    My 'best friend' I've grown apart from, she's become someone I'm not sure I like and she lives over an hour away so dont have much to do with her anyway.
    And I never stayed in touch with the people I was friends with through school (they thought I was strange )

    So what I'm wondering is, how do you make friends when your in your late 20's

    I work by myself most of the day so work mates is kind of out.

    I am going to be taking Burlesque classes in a few weeks (fingers crossed it depends where they are held) so maybe I might meet someone there.

    It almost feels like I'm dating again

  2. #2
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    I have found that we have to put it out there in efforts to make friends. They do not miraculously come to us.

    The class is a great idea, for some, church groups work. Over time our circumstances as well as those of friends do change and we can grow apart. That is normal. Many though have also taken the work to stay in touch even though far away. Any relationship takes effort.

    Hope you have a blast at the class.

    Any posts made under the name of Di_dee1 one can be used by anyone as I do not give a rats.

  3. #3
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    Um, I'm no help Bordeaux, I don't have any friends. Seriously. Lots of ppl i know and talk to and relate with, but I wouldn't call them friends.
    Kinda don't have time really either, but I guess you could say I have my husband and my sons and Logan and of course life is always busy. Lol.

    Did have best friends in Qld whom I miss at times, but 10 years is a long time, so like you I understand everything changes and ppl grow apart anyway.

    Are there places you go with the dogs that you meet ppl at all? They would obviously also be dog lovers so at least you would share that in common.
    Do you have any mutual friends that you share with your partner at all? (Hmm, not sure i worded that right. Woops.)

    Joining the class you are sounds like a way of meeting others, but that doesn't necessarily mean there will anyone there that you click with IYKWIM.

    I honestly have always beleived if we can count friends (I mean real true friends) on one hand in our whole lifetime, we are VERY lucky.
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  4. #4
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    I met my very best friends thru dog showing nearly 20 years ago.

    I agree with Di that it takes a bit of effort to stay in touch as we've both gone thru various stages of our lives that haven taken up our time. But we email on a regular basis and talk on the phone weekly.

    I've got friends from motorcycle clubs and other activities so I'd say my friends come about from common interests, so hopefully you'll meet some great people from your class.

  5. #5
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    I think the only actual friends I've made since high school I have met through other friends...if I had to start over, I do believe I'd be stuffed!

    But like Di and DA said, get yourself out there and meet people. What size town are you in? Classes are a good place to start. And dog people are the best people!

  6. #6
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    Maybe join an community org that has an interest for you. Afterall like minded people are going to have something in common with you from the ground up. I have met some amazing people through rescue, some true life friends. Some nuttersd too lol, but because we are all in it for the same outcome, we always have a lot in common.

    Onee more thing, be kind to yourself!! Go have that coffee and read a magazine. This too can be very enjoyable!
    SPR fosters:Rowland, Matrix, Mia, Arizona, Romeo, Wrinkles, George, Molly, Su Lin, Ellie, Charlie, Charlotte, Lulu, Montana http://www.sharpeirescue.com.au

  7. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by meegsndogs View Post
    I think the only actual friends I've made since high school I have met through other friends...if I had to start over, I do believe I'd be stuffed!

    But like Di and DA said, get yourself out there and meet people. What size town are you in? Classes are a good place to start. And dog people are the best people!
    And horse people.

  8. #8
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    Unfortunatly my OH isn't social at all.
    He's really only got one friend who he also works with so they dont really see each other out of work unless we go to his club on a friday or sat night.

    I've been trying to make friends with his girlfriend, she's really nice and we get along great but it's hard as she already has her circle of friends and I dont really click with them (ok I'll admit I'm completely jealous (sp?) they're hot, thin, 22 year olds who are really really nice)

    I'm in Epping, so there's plenty of people, just doesn't help I'm really shy

  9. #9

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    I know how you feel. It's gotten better recently, but for a long time the only "friend" I seemed to have was my boyfriend. I even went so far as to post a friend ad on Gumtree! Pathetic, right? :P Anyway, I guess in the end I just started reconnecting with some acquaintances I had and working with them on a few projects, and meeting people through them. It kind of flowed into me having stuff to do with people almost every weekend and having people to catch up with. I wish I could give you a step by step guide (this is what I was first looking for!) and sorry that I can't be more help

  10. #10
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    Bordeax, may i ask you to look deep and honestly and ask yourself just what it is you would like from a friend?

    * What would having friend/s fulfill for me right now?
    * What needs do I have that aren't being met by not having friends?

    Oh you get the point, I hope. I am the least social person i know. I have no need for friends as I don't find anything lacking in my life, or missing. My husband is also rather unsocial. Although he drives me batty and alot of the time i wanna kill him (lol), we are kinda old school - he is my one true friend that I share everything with and can rabble onto for hours on end about nothing, and visa versa.

    Find what it is specifically you would like to share within a freindship. Do those things yourself, and more times than not, a friend will materialise when you least need one.
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