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Thread: How Do You Make Friends??

  1. #11
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    Nov 2009
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    I believe that you certainly have to get yourself into a mindset to find new friends, you have to pry yourself out of your shell and put yourself out there.

    You don't have to be the funniest or thinest or anything else, but being a really good listener and asking questions is a good way to start.

    Have a look what's on offer in your local area, try the local animal shelter for instance put yourself down for the same walking or food preparation roster and meet the others there.

  2. #12
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    Aug 2009
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    Adelaide
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    When I first moved back home from Canberra, I had a lot of trouble making friends. It was like everyone else in their mid thirties was busy having families and I was viewed as very strange for being single and female and not that interested in having kids. I confused a lot of people who thought I was g a y, though actual lesbians picked me as not g a y very quickly (instantly even).

    I too, wanted someone I could go have coffee and a chat with, or the occasional meal out - not with my mum. I found my old uni friends helped out with this. Especially ones that also worked in the city and through them I met some more. They were all very geeky / nerdy so the single no kids mid thirties was no big deal to many of them.

    I have found that being in the hockey club - a great source of friends in Canberra - did nothing for me in Adelaide - I've got no idea why. I think I've picked up a couple of friends and a lot of people to say hello to but nobody to have coffee with.

    Scuba club was pretty good despite the fact that chatting underwater is difficult. But the best club / activity for new friends is dog training and dog walking. Picked up heaps of friends that way. I think the friendly nature of my dog helps too. Ie it's hard to like someone with an aggressive or badly behaved dog.

    If you want to pick up some basic social skills like how to talk to people and make them feel good about themselves and you - toastmasters is excellent. There's bound to be a club near you.

    Toastmasters find a club australia > nsw > epping

    Enthusiastic Epping Toastmasters Club - Club #: 5335, Dist #: 70, Est: 11/01/1983
    Epping Creative Centre
    Dence Park, 26 Stanley Road, Epping, NSW, 2121, Australia
    0411756992
    Meeting Time: 7:00 pm, 1st & 3rd Tuesday
    Club Status: Open to all
    Last edited by Hyacinth; 06-17-2010 at 07:36 PM.

  3. #13
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    Feb 2009
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    Melbourne
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    Quote Originally Posted by Devil's Advocate View Post
    Bordeax, may i ask you to look deep and honestly and ask yourself just what it is you would like from a friend?

    * What would having friend/s fulfill for me right now?
    * What needs do I have that aren't being met by not having friends?
    I guess I'm looking for someone I can talk to. While my OH is fantastic he can be really frusterating to talk to at times and sometimes I just want to b**** about him

    I'd love to be able to able to go to cafes or drop in for coffee.
    I would like to invite someone round for dinner occationally.

    Ok that does sound a little 'poor me' but it's not, I just kind of feel there's something missing in my life.

  4. #14

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    Not that this helps your situation, but my best friends have 4 legs & a fur coat. I like hanging out with you guys here, but it wouldn't worry me at all if I never saw another human being face to face.

  5. #15
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    Feb 2009
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    Melbourne
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hyacinth View Post
    Toastmasters find a club australia > nsw > epping

    Enthusiastic Epping Toastmasters Club - Club #: 5335, Dist #: 70, Est: 11/01/1983
    Epping Creative Centre
    Dence Park, 26 Stanley Road, Epping, NSW, 2121, Australia
    0411756992
    Meeting Time: 7:00 pm, 1st & 3rd Tuesday
    Club Status: Open to all
    Sounds interesting, but wrong Epping (I'm in Melb) I'll check it out when I get home.

  6. #16
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    Oct 2009
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    Devonport, Tasmania
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    No, it doesn't sound poor me at all, just honest and realistic IMO.

    I guess before I had my children, the thought of not having friends around to visit, go out with, have a meal etc would have been very hard to deal with.

    Have you tried bitching to your hubby about your hubby? PMSL. Works for me.

    Isn't it amazing that when you do have kids, you seem to come across pll everywhere to be friends with, but then you don't have the time nor the inclination nor the need to make the effort. Sigh.

    Anybody on here around your area Bordeax?
    [CENTER][SIGPIC][/SIGPIC][/CENTER]

  7. #17
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    Melbourne
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    Quote Originally Posted by GSDs4Ever View Post
    Not that this helps your situation, but my best friends have 4 legs & a fur coat. I like hanging out with you guys here, but it wouldn't worry me at all if I never saw another human being face to face.
    I'd be an absolute mess if it wasn't for my 2 furry ones, I do admit if I had to make a choice between a new friend and my dogs it would be them.

    But right now, homes not fantastic and it just makes me realise I dont have anyone I can turn to other than my OH and when it's his mother thats the problem I have trouble talking to him about it.

    I do like talking to the people here but I dont communicate well typing and often what I want to say doesn't come across right.

  8. #18
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    Oct 2009
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    Devonport, Tasmania
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    [QUOTE=Bordeaux;102941]I'd be an absolute mess if it wasn't for my 2 furry ones, I do admit if I had to make a choice between a new friend and my dogs it would be them.

    But right now, homes not fantastic and it just makes me realise I dont have anyone I can turn to other than my OH and when it's his mother thats the problem I have trouble talking to him about it.

    I do like talking to the people here but I dont communicate well typing and often what I want to say doesn't come across right.[/QUOTE]

    Just keep typing then till it does.

    Is his mother still living with you? Oh cripes.
    [CENTER][SIGPIC][/SIGPIC][/CENTER]

  9. #19
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    Sydney
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    Arrr now I see why you're feeling the way you are - MIL problems.

    God I could write an essay on mine. Think I liked my last MIL better than this one, shame we both didn't like her son so much.

    Anyway, bitch away to the best of your ability, I don't think you can upset anyone here regarding MIL's no matter how you type it.

    But seriously I can really recommend dog clubs, they always need volunteer help, whether it be on the enrollment table, printing off newsletters etc, at least you'll meet some acquaintances and from there might stem some good friends.

  10. #20
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    Melbourne
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    Yep she is. She's due to have an op next month so she wont be going untill she's over that at the very least. And her depression is getting worse which is making me feel like a horrible person because I come home and the last thing I want to hear is how she doesn't think the pysio (sp?) is not doing anything and she doesn't want to go to the pool for her exersize and she's sick of seeing doctors so she blew it off and went shopping.


    hmmmm do you think I needed to get that off my chest hehe

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