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Thread: Just a Brief Rant

  1. #1
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    Default Just a Brief Rant

    I just got off the phone with my dear MIL. I have just sat through another hour long lecture as to why I am bad for my hubby... I have news for her... If I was that bad for him we wouldn't be married.... We wouldn't own our own home, we wouldn't own our own cars and we wouldn't be happy let alone still together! Oh and for the billionth time I don't want kids, I physically cannot have kids and I will not be giving you grandchildren - start bugging your daughter not me! No you cannot come up next week and reclean my home because you don't think I have the ability to clean it properly. No, I will not shut down my business to go back to a job that I had already reached the limit in, and No, I am not going to be taking on my EA job full time because a: They don't need me for the hours I'm working now, let alone more and b: My business is very sucessful and I am now very annoyed with you!

    I could go on but this just about covers it:

    So how many others have MILs/FILs that are the same? Please tell me there are others.... I don't want to be alone in this!

  2. #2
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    Oh Angela you poor thing

    Hubby and I don't want kids either, but have talked about adopting if we ever change our minds. Told the MIL this once... wow did she crack it. Apparently a psychic once told her that her son would have 3 children. I informed her he would have to find another wife then!

  3. #3
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    Woo, hang on a minute Angela! You actually sat there on the phone for an hour and let her lecture you? Are you serious?

    Ok, don't tell me it was out of respect to your hubby. Don't tell me you were trying not to be nasty to her. Don't tell me any of those things.

    I hope you said all those things TO HER!!! Loud and clear with NO misunderstanding of what your opinion is.

    I have gone through **** with my MIL and never will again. I will not allow myself to be put through it, treated like that, talked to like that, or listen to her **** for one moment.
    To do otherwise would not be resepcting myself!

  4. #4
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    Angela, next time my advice would be to cut the call off.

  5. #5
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    Quote Originally Posted by Devil's Advocate View Post
    Woo, hang on a minute Angela! You actually sat there on the phone for an hour and let her lecture you? Are you serious?

    Ok, don't tell me it was out of respect to your hubby. Don't tell me you were trying not to be nasty to her. Don't tell me any of those things.

    I hope you said all those things TO HER!!! Loud and clear with NO misunderstanding of what your opinion is.

    I have gone through **** with my MIL and never will again. I will not allow myself to be put through it, treated like that, talked to like that, or listen to her **** for one moment.
    To do otherwise would not be resepcting myself!
    Oh, one hour is SHORT! Normally she arrives for 3 days and follows me everywhere!

    The hardest part is finding a gap in the sentences and speaking my mind. I'm starting to believe (after nearly 2 years of this almost daily!) that it doesn't matter what I say because she won't listen anyway. It literally doesn't get through to her. Now the phone call ends with me saying "Are you finished" MIL saying "Yes" Me saying "What were you calling for?" MIL: "I need to know the size of your living room windows" Me: "They're x times y" MIL: "Thank you, you will have new curtains when I visit next" Me: "But I've just made new curtains and they're already hung" MIL: "Ok, but I'll bring these up next time. All my love to *hubby*" Me: "Fine. Enjoy your day, bye bye"

  6. #6
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    Quote Originally Posted by Angela's Gone Batty View Post
    Oh, one hour is SHORT! Normally she arrives for 3 days and follows me everywhere!

    The hardest part is finding a gap in the sentences and speaking my mind. I'm starting to believe (after nearly 2 years of this almost daily!) that it doesn't matter what I say because she won't listen anyway. It literally doesn't get through to her. Now the phone call ends with me saying "Are you finished" MIL saying "Yes" Me saying "What were you calling for?" MIL: "I need to know the size of your living room windows" Me: "They're x times y" MIL: "Thank you, you will have new curtains when I visit next" Me: "But I've just made new curtains and they're already hung" MIL: "Ok, but I'll bring these up next time. All my love to *hubby*" Me: "Fine. Enjoy your day, bye bye"
    What does your husband do to defend you?

  7. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by Disneygotpierced View Post
    What does your husband do to defend you?
    Tells her to butt out of his life, leave me alone. He tells her that I am perfect for him and he wants me to stay around so stop trying to chase me out of his life. If she keeps going he rings his sister and distracts MIL with SIL - works every time and gives me enough time to get away. This afternoon sucked because I was home alone and couldn't get away. BUT I did put the phone down on speaker and got a heap of housework done, so that is a bonus.

    ETA: I do have to say that in some ways I am happy that she cares. My mother couldn't give a rats behind about what is going on and I would rather have an overbearing MIL than an uncaring one. Hubby is brilliant at diverting her which is great, I just long for call waiting on the house phone as that way I could avoid the calls!
    Last edited by Angela's Gone Batty; 01-09-2010 at 06:40 PM.

  8. #8
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    Angela, I AM a mother in law. I would never ever think of doing that to my daughter in Law.

    I do have different thoughts to her at times but I usually do not voice them as she is boss in her own home, my son chose her to marry and be the mother of his children.

    If something really does affect me then yes, I will say something. I will preface it with..I really need to talk to you regarding.... I feel, ..I am upset because..... This has only happened about 4 times in 6 years and talking through gave compromise, agreeing to disagree or a change to what was happening.

    I am so sorry you are having this happen. Quite frankly, she needs to be put in her place. This will only happen with your husband's total support and a plan you stick to, much like training a dog, consistency is needed. One lapse and you are back at the beginning . To me it seems like a total lack of respect. I wonder too about loneliness on her part and enjoying the role that YOU are allowing her to have.

    Many hugs.
    Last edited by Di_dee1; 01-09-2010 at 06:43 PM.

    Any posts made under the name of Di_dee1 one can be used by anyone as I do not give a rats.

  9. #9
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    Quote Originally Posted by Di_dee1 View Post
    Angela, I AM a mother in law. I would never ever think of doing that to my daughter in Law.

    I do have different thoughts to her at times but I usually do not voice them as she is boss in her own home, my son chose her to marry and be the mother of his children.

    If something really does affect me then yes, I will say something. I will preface it with..I really need to talk to you regarding.... I feel, ..I am upset because..... This has only happened about 4 times in 6 years and talking through gave compromise, agreeing to disagree or a change to what was happening.

    I am so sorry you are having this happen. Quite frankly, she needs to be put in her place. This will only happen with your husband's total support and a plan you stick to, much like training a dog, consistency is needed. One lapse and you are back at the beginning . To me it seems like a total lack of respect. I wonder too about loneliness on her part and enjoying the role that YOU are allowing her to have.
    Many hugs.
    Don't allow her to play this role.

  10. #10
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    ooh the phone battery just wen<click>

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