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Thread: Vent!!

  1. #41
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    Hi Laura

    That sounds better, but one camping trip a year? Is that enough for you?

    What was his excuse for not letting you know what was going on?

    I think you should be looking for one date night a week. Otherwise he could just swap you out for his mum. I'd be looking for equal time with the lads. Most of the partnered up folks I know - it's like 3 date nights with partner to 1 night out with the boys, ie 3hours with you to 1 hour with mates. If any of my friends get partners - I hadly get to see them any more but we're still friends.

    Definitely keep in mind the "get gone" weekend for you just to help him sort his priorities. You may also want to get him to tell you in advance when he's doing stuff with his mates so you can plan to do stuff too so you're too busy to feel sorry for yourself because he's not there.

  2. #42
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    Look Laura, you do what it is you feel is best for you to do NOW, at this stage of your life.
    If it works out (this relationship I mean) fantastic. If it doesn't, there will come a time when you know what to do. Everything happens in it's own good time.

    All the best, Laura. Just don't EVER forget how important YOU are.

  3. #43
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    well i do appreciate the advice everyone i really do but please dont get cranky with me if i dont walk out on a three year relationship because of one issue and because my internet buddies tell me too =( i did take your advice and you made me confident that there was a problem and it was'nt just me and you also encouraged me to sit down and talk about it..which i did...and i think its had a good out come but we will see if things improve if they dont then i will have to reconsider things but if they do im happy i gave it another go

    cheers everyone and thanks again =)

  4. #44
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    Quote Originally Posted by Cleasanta View Post
    I am so glad a man entered this thread! Men and women DO think differently...that is what makes us men and women.

    You are right Peter...there is always 2 sides to a story and we don't know his side!

    I will however say...there is a difference between hanging out with your mates every once in a while....and preffering to be with them and not touching base as to where you are or what you are doing. This behaviour would NEVER be tolerated here...not from any of us! Both of us would be worried sick as to whether something had happened to the other person...it is disrespectful and plain nasty!

    Since you are a man...you can fill us in on the whole..."he is just not that into you"...thing. Can you honestly say that if you really are into a woman...you would not call her...you would not "stay over"...you would not have sex...you would not let her know where you are...etc etc? Just wondering

    Depends i suppose on the individual, i have some mates who focus %100 on partners and i have others who still love thier partners but probaly focus alot less on them as what they do themselves. Personally i would never spend a night out without prior agreement or a phone call.
    i know personally after being engaged to be married at around 24 and then breaking up, it then for quite a while became all about me and what i wanted to do, even whilst having partners in this time. Sounds selfish but i gave alot to my fiance only to have it thrown all away, after those 5 years i wanted "me" time.
    In some cases its probably like the proverbial "having your cake and eat it too".

  5. #45
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    Here's a reason why men should stay clear of giving advice


  6. #46
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    Lmao!!!

  7. #47

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    ROFL ..... love it, love it, love it !!! Good one Pete !!

  8. #48
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    Hi Laura

    Do what you must do. If it works out, great, if it doesn't, it's all good practice for the right relationship when it comes along.

    I don't know how you can call it "just one issue" though. But you know what you want better than I do. Venting is fine. Sometimes when one "vents" one isn't always looking for "fixes".

    And we'll be here for you or some of us will - which ever way it goes.

  9. #49
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    Don't stay where you are not happy. I did that and ended up married to a complete douche who is the father of my boys and I'm stuck with him for life *sob sob*

    Get selfish, start demanding what it is you deserve, and if he isnt willing to give you that or even compromise, tell him to pack his ****, leave the fry-pan and hope the door don't hit him on his ass on his way out.


  10. #50
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    Venting is fine. Sometimes when one "vents" one isn't always looking for "fixes".
    Amen to that!! I vent all the time to my mum (not ALL the time but shes the person i go and talk to) and she's constantly trying to find a way to fix it/make it better when in fact all i want is to yell and scream and then head on my merry way...

    i think you were pretty brave to say you were having issues on here, but a lot of the time the natural instinct in us is to give advice and fix the issue..

    Everyone has different stages and thresholds, i know i put up with a lot from my OH then i have with anyone else, exes included.. I don't know if its a good thing or not but you do..

    Good luck with everything but do keep the information these wonderful people have offered you and re-evaluate if need be..

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