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Thread: Vent!!

  1. #11
    Join Date
    Feb 2009
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    Melbourne
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    I agree with whats been said already.

    Without knowing you or him personally it's hard to judge the situation but from what you write you really need to have a long talk with him, the relationship seems very one sided.

    This is for you

  2. #12
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    Sep 2009
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    melbourne
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    well ive just got back from work, and he's not here and he hasnt called or messaged,

    he is a lovely person genuine and honest. and i do love him we are very similar. when hes not arround and sometimes when he is i do hang out with my friends and other times im at home.
    i dont know what im going to do, i called him but got no answer, i guess he has to come home sometime

  3. #13
    Join Date
    Oct 2009
    Location
    Rural NSW
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    Please do not become a doormat to him. You can either do nothing and allow all this to continue. If you wish this path then it is your choice and it is no use complaining to yourself as you have allowed it.

    Or you can say you need to talk, cards on the table when it is a quiet neutral time. Tell him how you feel, seek compromise, a solution where both win. A man who loves you will want to try and sort things so you both are then happier.

    If he will not do this, does not think it is important then I would be seriously rethinking my relationship. I left my first husband after 8 years. All my efforts at trying to talk, him thinking there was nothing to talk about. He got a great shock because yes, it was far too late for me and his attitude of everything was ok when it was not for me. He had no idea how serious it had become as he just stuck his head in the sand.

    Any posts made under the name of Di_dee1 one can be used by anyone as I do not give a rats.

  4. #14
    Join Date
    Nov 2009
    Location
    Numurkah
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    681

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    Laura -- Show him where the door is.

  5. #15

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    I'm with Hyancith ... go buy the book "He's just not that into you" and read it. The writer has a great expression "Don't waste the pretty".

    Wouldn't you rather know now that's it's not going to work out and not in another year's .... or 5 years time ??

    Sorry Sweetie. You're not holding him to a high enough standard of being treated with dignity & respect. Accepting the way you are being treated as you've described it would be a "deal breaker" for me.

  6. #16
    Join Date
    Jan 2009
    Location
    Sunshine Coast, Qld
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    Everyone has given very sound advice here. I can't really add anything. I was going to say the same as GSD. if things are not meant to be, better to do something about it now that years down the road. It would be a very very difficult move for you but ultimately it sounds like it would be a good one.
    The best things in life, aren't things

  7. #17

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    Laura, I think the ladies such as myself, Tkay, Di, Hyacinth, Cate0404, Bordeaux, Clea (sorry if I've missed anyone) are all speaking from experience ... right girls ??

    I sure wasted a lot of "pretty" on ... let's just say .... very unsuitable partners who didn't treat me very well .... but then .... I allowed it to happen until I woke up. I'm sure you love him Laura, but just remember, love isn't supposed to hurt. Your partner should treat you like you're the most special person on the planet.

  8. #18
    Join Date
    Nov 2009
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    Near Newcastle, NSW
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    I think women are their own worst enemy sometimes. We are the ones enabling this sort of behaviour. We come up with excuses as to why they haven't called...why they haven't come around...why they are not staying the night...why they don't feel like having sex anymore.

    If a man is into you he WILL call...he WILL come around...he WILL stay the night...he WILL spend time with you...he WILL put you first in his life...he WILL answer your sms immediately and/or pick up the phone call from you and FOR SURE WILL NOT say no to sex!!!! He will treat you like a Queen...he will be attentive, kind and understanding. He will do everything to make sure he has called you...to spend spare time with you! Some men do this behaviour to make you do their dirty work...like being then one breaking up the relationship.

    He WILL NOT piss off with his mates...not contacting you and not pick up his phone...not letting you know where he is!!! He WILL NOT try and hurt you!

    Laura...you need to see this for what it is and seeing this from an outsider's point of view...it doesn't look pretty.

    His behaviour is an absolute deal breaker...NOOOO doubt about that.

    Adding: I will say it again...Love is one thing...LIKE is another! By you writing this post I assume you don't like him and his behaviours very much. Being in a relationship with someone you don't like is in my opinion...a waste of time!!!
    Last edited by Cleasanta; 12-20-2009 at 06:22 PM.

  9. #19

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    Quote Originally Posted by Cleasanta View Post
    sex...period!
    So off topic but ... ergh. Shouldn't be in a sentence together.

  10. #20
    Join Date
    Nov 2009
    Location
    Near Newcastle, NSW
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    Quote Originally Posted by gsds4ever View Post
    so off topic but ... Ergh. Shouldn't be in a sentence together.
    hahahahahahahahaha!!!

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