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Thread: "Women Only" Bitching Room About Men..

  1. #111
    Join Date
    Oct 2009
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    Devonport, Tasmania
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    6,675

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    Yes Cleasanta, he received treatment - of sorts. Therapy sessions that he took on board and threw out of his memory the moment he walked out of the doctor's therapy room each time. Lol. I think he preferred the voices in his head to the doctors, silly bugger.

    Laughing at Puggers' "happy thought." Unfortunately your happy thought is mild compared to the true facts of his death. I wouldn't wish that on ANY human being, no matter what they'd done. To do so would make me feel like an animal, I think, but I haven't always felt that way, I will admit.

    I agree that there is NEVER a good reason for sexual abuse. Unfortunately that doesn't stop the many reasons it does happen. I have never been sexually abused in my life, so cannot say whether I would EVER be able fo find forgiveness in my heart for the perpetrator. Cannot even begin to know. All I DO know is that forgiveness heals a **** load of things, though, and helps one to move on the best that they can.

    A movie that caused a great deal of controversy when it was released many, many years ago was one which starred Sean Penn and the wonderful Susan Sarrendon. It was called "Dead Man Walking." Very interesting movie, to say the least!

  2. #112
    Join Date
    Nov 2009
    Location
    WA
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    803

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    ladies im really sorry to hear about your ex husbands. I reckon you alll are very strong ladies and well done!!!

  3. #113
    Join Date
    Oct 2008
    Location
    Canberra
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    1,536

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    I have the feelings that I do because of the way he has treated all four of my children, I no longer think of him as my children's father as he is non-exsitant in my kids lives. My thinking (wrong or rightly) that then my 4 kids will have a logical reason why their father has wants nothing to do with them and hasn't for the last 3 years.
    A little back ground - my ex walked out when my youngest was three months to live with his "new" girlfriend who live 8 minutes walking distance away, when I made him speak to his daughter on the phone 2.5 years ago she asked if she could see him. His response was that he was in Brisbane working and it wasn't a good time to talk and hung up. We went to the shops the next day (I still remember I needed milk and eggs because the kids wanted French Toast) and lo and behold who was at the shops? Then worse yet who turned his back and may as well have run from the shops when his then 9 year old daughter called out to him.
    I could go on and on but rather than bore you all to tears I will stop now.
    I would like to be able to answer the question - "Why does Dad want nothing to do with us?" with "Because he has passed" not "Because Dad has issues ".....and we go through the speal again.
    I respect and understand that you are dealing with your issues of your ex one way but I need to deal with it my way. I don't want to run him down right now - but if he was to die then he wouldn't be missed and I certainly would not shed a tear. That may be harsh and I will drop it now but I just wanted to explain that my previous comment wash not something I was throwing around lightly.
    Crap I just a quick look through this post - it is HUGE ...... sorry!

  4. #114
    Join Date
    May 2009
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    How awful for your children cate404. Sadly, it is the children who suffer through break-ups and through the lack of responsibility taken by some parents.
    A pessimist sees the glass as half empty;
    An optimist sees the glass as half full;
    A realist just finishes the damn thing and refills it.

  5. #115

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    Quote Originally Posted by Anne View Post
    How awful for your children cate404. Sadly, it is the children who suffer through break-ups and through the lack of responsibility taken by some parents.
    I agree. Just because the children are silent, doesn't mean they are coping with the violence going on all around them. They are not "resilliant & will just bounce back" as a lot of people seem to think. They blame themselves for the break up & are very often scared for life.

  6. #116

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    Having a moment and need to vent, but after reading some other posts here I know I will be O.K, I have my kids, a job and my beautiful house on acres and all my animals.
    Sitting here with the divorce papers – big decision sign, don’t sign.
    I have had one big discovery year (2009) where has it gone, so looking forward to Xmas with family - first time in 20 years I will spend with them – cause I can now.

    2008 was a shocker of a year, would never wish it upon anyone. The year started out well - happily married (19 years), wonderful husband, best dad, three beautiful kids (15, 14, 10 ) debt free, both in good jobs, I was living the dream, wanted for nothing, not a care in the world.

    THEN:

    March 2008 eldest daughter (only 15 years old) gets ill and rushed to Sydney Hospital, diagnosised with throat cancer. (Not a smoker in sight and no kid does not smoke). Endless rounds of chemo and radiation treatment and major surgery to remove half her throat. (Horror, horror, horror)

    Nov 2008, just when things seem to settle with daughter, husband then drops the biggest bombshell of them all he has been having an AFFAIR. ( I’m away saving and watching our child go through cancer treatment and he’s having an affair.) The affair is with my youngest child’s friend’s mother.

    Husband is given marching orders, leaves with nothing except his car and the last thing he says to me is “ I am not leaving you for her, but I am leaving you because of her.”

    Next three weeks are a blur,(if only I lived in Africa they both would have been stoned to death.)

    Then exactly one month after telling me he rings me to tell me she is pregnant.

    I nor my children have heard from my ex since that day.

    I truly believe in karma and what goes around comes around. I would never have imagined for one second that my husband would have done this and then to have nothing to do with his kids, no way, guess I really didn’t know him at all.
    Mind made up I am going to sign the divorce papers.
    Last edited by mackenzie; 12-30-2009 at 12:36 PM. Reason: Spelling error

  7. #117

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    So glad you got it all out & made the decision to sign the papers. Having a good old fashioned vent will do that for you.

    The people on this forum are really terrific. They listen without making judgements. So a big aboard. Settle in & have fun scooting around the threads.

  8. #118
    Join Date
    Oct 2008
    Location
    Canberra
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    Well firstly welcome mackenzie and secondly I am so sorry for the s ** t year you had I hope once you put ink to paper things will start turning around for you.

  9. #119

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    Quote Originally Posted by cate0404 View Post
    Well firstly welcome mackenzie and secondly I am so sorry for the s ** t year you had I hope once you put ink to paper things will start turning around for you.
    (Off topic I know) .... did you get my confirmation email ??

  10. #120
    Join Date
    Oct 2008
    Location
    Canberra
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    Yes sorry GSD's tried to confirm back got this virus thingy!

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