What to Do??? Do I Want Another Dog?

[PEPSI]

Hi all,

as some of you know i have been thinking about getting another dog so Pepsi would have a playmate, i have been looking at rescued Staffies, but we went to the RSPCA yesterday and met the most adorable Maltese poodle cross.

She has experienced some abuse and like Pepsi has bad skin from not being groomed, she is around 3 yrs old, we have asked them to hold her until tonight and we are taking Pepsi for the drive to meet her and see what happens. The main concern i have is she is scared of men, she was not comfortable with my husband and it took her about 30 minutes before she would accept a treat from him. He works from home and will be with her all day every day. He would never hurt or harm anything but i am concerned the dog will not settle in properly.

I am not concerned about her health issues, i have dealt with Pepsi and i accept that taking on an older dog with abuse will be a lot of work but i am not sure i have the energy.

So the questions are:

would you do it?
can you get a dog over a fear of men?
any other advice?

Thanks in advance

Cass

[Masha]

Dogs live in the moment - yes, she will remember abuse, but once she has a loving home, it'll all disappear.
My advice is not to baby her, not to treat her 'special' just because she has suffered. It will only make things worse.
Yes, dogs get over fears, but it will take time and dedication.
TBH, if I were in your position, I wouldnt do it I would much rather a happy dog (mainly because I am not in the right position) , with no fear of men, but if you are in the position to dedicate time and money to help with her skin condition and to help her get over her fear, then go ahead.
Best of luck!

[GreysAreGreat]

Masha has made some great points!

I think the main question would be - Is your husband (and you) willing to put in the time, effort and patience that is needed for the poor girl? If he is, then I'd say go for it, yes it's hard work doing rehabilitation but the rewards are huge!

Dogs CAN be turned around in situations like this, but not everyone has the time etc to dedicate to it.

Good luck this afternoon!

[aussiemyf7]

Can i start by saying...thankyou!!!!!!!!
SWF's are so overbred by idiots and make up a huge number in shelters.

I think she will 'get over' her fear of men, but as Masha said it takes dedication, plus time, patience and love.
Prepare for it to become your hubbys dog though. He will have to be her main handler. Feeding, walking, grooming.
When he approaches and pets, he'll have to get nice and low, speak quietly and calmly.
If he constantly gives her treats and assures her, she will associate him with being a good thing.
I'll give a more detailed post when the time arises

[mouseandchicken]

I guess the best person to ask is your husband. Is he willing to accept that this dog may take a long time to come around to him? Is he willing to accept that it may always shy or jump when he moves suddenly.

These would be the questions I would ask myself and family

Do you know the dog has been abused by men or are you assuming because of how it reacted around your husband.

I say this because we would have fear aggressive dogs come in for boarding in the kennels and they would always accept the female kennel hands but not the male kennels hands until some weeks later.

What attracts you to this dog? Do you feel sorry for it? I know it's hard not too. Do you really think you can make a difference to this dog? Or do you think another more suitable dog will come along?

I'm just throwing out things for you to think about. For all I know this could be the one and everything will turn out just fine.

[PEPSI]

Ok, I will try to address everything, but if i forget something sorry!

We have the time and money to dedicate to this dog, I am assuming the dog was abused, for a couple of reasons, she seemed afraid of my OH, she has some fairly serious scars on her side and her tummy, and she has some damage around her neck.

My OH is more than willing to spend hours with her building up trust, he works from home so they will be together all day. He has never hurt our dog, he growls at her but never shouts. We went back to the RSPCA last night with PEPSI and they seemed to get along ok. The other dog also seeing Pepsi go to my oh seemed to realise he was the man with the treats in his pocket and after about an hour she would go to him.

yes so far we have spent about 3 hours with this dog!

the thing i am worried about is we are going on holidays in may, during that time she will be holidaying with my parents, i am concerned that she is going to think she has been abandoned again although she will be with pepsi.

I have also been through this with Pepsi, she has shocking skin issues when we got her, it took about 12 months to sort out, i dont really know if i can expect my parents to continue treatment.

I also know that she will probably not be adopted, people dont want a 3 yr old dog with issues. She is the cutest little thing, not really what we are looking for but i know she will be PTS and i would hate for that to happen. Yes i do feel sorry for her but it is more that her previous owner obviously did not love her and she has missed out on the experience of being completely loved.

thank you for your responses, i dont want to traumatise this poor pup any more if i cant commit to her. but it seems fairly likely she will be coming home tomorrow night! failing anything else coming to light!

[mouseandchicken]

If this is the dog for you then I wouldn't worry too much about going on holiday. It might set her back a little bit, or the time with your parents might be just the thing?? She will come back into your house, re-settle and continue on her recovery.

Sorry if I sounded harsh, as I said I was throwing things out there - all the negatives and since you still could see all the positives and Pepsi and her get along then go with what your feeling.

[Bohemiannic]

It sounds like Pepsi and this new little darling might be a good match! Sounds like the new one will take direction from Pepsi, i.e. with realising that your husband is the one with the treats!
Best of luck with this, but it sounds like you have a new dog!

[PEPSI]

Thank you for your support, it is probably only a matter of time before i am on here wingeing about this dog.

Thank you for your honestly, i wanted people to point out the negative aspects as well as the positive, i know taking is rescued dog can be hard work and i dont profess to know it all but with everyones support i am sure it will all work out.

[JudgeTheDeedNotTheBreed]

Best of luck mate

Best advice I can give you regarding fear towards males is:

When your hubby approaches her tell him to get down on his knees, side on (this is our smallest side and therefore less threatening). Tell him NOT TO STARE at her, very intimidating. He can look but he needs to look and then look away, look then look away etc etc. KEEP GIVING HER TREATS!!.

Also something I found helpful is teaching the touch command. Youn rub a treat in your left hand then put the treat in your right. Show the dog your left hand and when they touch your left hand with their nose (for a sniff) say "touch" and then treat them from your right hand! This may be something the new pup and your hubby can work on together

Best of luck mate human fear is hard to deal with (I do it every day) but the slightest bit of a step forward is very very exhilarating!!!

Feel free to ask me for any advice and also feel free to pass any on that you find work lol